08 May, 2011

Cynical Meanings

Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool on the other. 

Divorce: Future tense of marriage. 

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either." 

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present. 

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece. 

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water power... 

Dictionary: A place where success comes before work. 

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on. 

Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read. 

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight. 

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life. 

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

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